formula for fandom.

I'm super competitive and love playing sports, but have never been a big sports fan. Going to baseball games is one of my favorite summer activities, but I care significantly more about eating garlic fries and socializing than I do about who wins the game. Sundays in the fall are full of frustration for me as half of the important people in my life are busy obsessing about their fantasy football teams and refuse to stray too far from the TV. The whole month of March I feel left out and annoyed about seeds and brackets and worried that T will have a heart attack or is actually losing his mind while he paces around the apartment and talks to the TV during Memphis games. I have to smile and pretend like I care when Syracuse sports come up in conversation; usually a generic comment about Boeheim and zone defense is enough to feign some level of interest in my alma mater before I have to awkwardly change the subject. It's not that I don't understand or enjoy sports; I appreciate an exciting game or web gem as much as the next person, I just really don’t about a particular player or team or sport as much as other people seem to.

I always thought maybe the specific sports were the problem. Perhaps if my friends followed softball or field hockey or something else I had actually played I could care and be a good fan. Or maybe being from Cleveland has taught me that being a fan just results in disappointment and heartache; it isn't since the Indians went to the World Series in ’95 and ‘97 that I can actually remember caring about any specific team. I'm always down to play catch or talk smack to losers and have spent lots of time thinking that being a real fan of something would be cool. I just couldn't pay attention to a game (let alone a whole series or tournament or season) long enough to actually consider myself a fan.

Then we moved exactly one block behind the Barclays Center. T was never really into the NBA, but liked basketball enough to be excited about going to Nets games. We casually went to a few in the fall and winter and I liked them alright. The vibe in Barclays was fun and the tickets were cheap and it was a good weeknight date that involved beer, snacks, and being in bed less than ten minutes after the end of the game. We kept going and the Nets started to get kind of good. At that point, I had Instagrammed enough generic photos of the Barclays Center from our $15 seats and was tired of spending the entire game thinking about what else I could eat. It was time for me to start paying attention and make a real effort to become a fan.

Naturally, my first move was to invest in some gear. I’ve never played basketball and lack a basic understanding of the game, but I still believed that my love of new things would undoubtedly translate to a love of a team. This was definitely not the first time that I convinced myself that purchases were the first step in cultivating love -- there was the Browns towel I bought before going to college so I could show my new dormmates what a "fan" I was as I walked to and from the bathroom, the OSU t-shirt I got on a college trip with my students that I now avoid wearing for fear of crossing paths with a Michigan fan and having my allegiance put to the test, and the Varejao jersey (actually a gift from a friend, I think) intended to increase my enthusiasm during Cavs games several years ago when Lebron made them good for a hot sec. Anyway, I got a Nets shirt and still didn't feel the love. It was going to take something deeper than material goods.

Regardless of the sport, one of the hardest parts about not being a fan is feeling left out of the competitive banter. I decided I needed an entry point to these conversations, and since that certainly wasn't going to have anything to do with basketball, I decided to pick a favorite player to brag about and defend. I quickly learned that it doesn't matter who your favorite is as long as you are ready to fight to the death in his defense. Sports fans have strong opinions, so I started to fake some of my own and could feel I was on to something. I decided on an initial favorite player very quickly, and learned enough about him to justify him being my favorite, but knew I had to feel a real connection before making a lasting decision about who deserved my undying love.  

Thankfully, the media figured this out far before I did and makes "getting to know" the players a cinch. I watched the interviews and melodramatic background stories about coming from nothing or overcoming terrible injuries. I followed them on Twitter and Instagram to see how likable and silly they are in their daily lives.  Seeing this photo of Paul Pierce and his family dressed up for Halloween was a pivotal moment in my growth as a Nets fan. Maybe I don't care about basketball, but wearing matching costumes with your adorable family?! Come on... if that's not a reason to love someone and want the best for him and his teammates, I don't know what is. 

My prior efforts at becoming a fan involved hours watching games searching for any hint of enjoyment and asking questions that were so boring that I didn't even listen to the answers. My research turned from figuring out who is a good player (insignificant) to who is a nice person (essential). These days when I’m trying to get into a sporting event, I ask the real questions to help me figure out which players and consequently, which teams, deserve my attention: Does he have a good personality? Is he funny? Is he a good teammate? Is he a good husband and father?  Turns out, the same qualities that make me love and respect people I actually know translate super easily to loving and respecting people I don't know. Being a true fan is a big deal, and I’m not about to put my all into rooting for a team of people that I know nothing about. This might be a silly realization, but it was life changing for this budding fan. 

The happy end here is that I'm officially the biggest Brooklyn Nets fan on earth. My get-to-know-the-players-first formula has also resulted in my genuine enjoyment of the World Cup, which I had previously dreaded and assumed would ruin my entire summer, and now I'm actually excited about my future endeavors as a sports fan. Dissecting my own path to fandom has left me with lots of questions. I’d love to hear from you guys… Who are your favorite players and teams? And, more importantly, why do they deserve your love? What keeps you invested in being a fan?

(thanks for the photo, Steve!)